Latest Viewings...
HELLBOY (2004) - Selma Blair bursts into flames when she's turned on. C
IGBY GOES DOWN (2002) - Nice sleeper flick. Clare Danes, yum. B
ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND (2004) - Great, but such an abrupt french ending. B+
BOTTLE ROCKET (1996) - Finally saw it. Good to see why the new stuff is so great B-
STARSKY & HUTCH (2004) - The original series was funnier, and it wasn't a comedy. C
ALONG CAME POLLY (2004) - By the book, but cute. Only one Aniston nipple sighting. C+
SNOW FALLING ON CEDARS (1999) - Too many weepy violins in the score. Awesome photog. C+
THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE RETURN OF THE KING (2003) - At least we have the first two. B
BIG FISH (2003) - The truth isn't as factual as the stories we weave. Favorite of the year. A
LOST IN TRANSLATION (2003) - Odd, it almost feels like a documentary. Lovely. A
IN AMERICA (2003) - Quite good. Starts strong and kinda fizzles. B
THE HAUNTED MANSION (2003) - Hmmm... not scary or funny. It managed to be boring though. That's something. D
ELF (2003) - ELF is LOL funny, but probably not ROFL funny. B
THE STATION AGENT (2003) - Nice portrait of an unlikely trio. B+
LOVE ACTUALLY (2003) - Actually, pretty crappy. No love from me. C-
SHADOW OF A DOUBT (1943) - Very different feeling Hitchcock film. Not so suspenseful. C+
THE SCHOOL OF ROCK (2003) - The vacancy left by John Belushi has finally been filled. B+
DUPLEX (2003) - The lamest twist ending ever. C-
PICKUP ON SOUTH STREET (1953) - Commies bad. Slappin' innocent girls around, good. Silly film noir fun. C
STEP INTO LIQUID (2003) - Too much blabbling about "the life". Surfers are kinda boring people. Nice images. B
THE QUIET AMERICAN (2002) - Jin-go-ism: extreme chauvinism or nationalism marked especially by a belligerent foreign policy B-
AMERICAN SPLENDOR (2003) - So good. Most original piece of filmmaking of the year. B+
OPEN RANGE (2003) - That Annette Bening sure is a purdy woman. Gives a fella the idear of settlin' down. B+
CHUCK & BUCK (2000) - Digital Video feature. Obsession not love... blah blah blah. Snore. C-
A CRY IN THE DARK (1988) - "A dingo took my..." Ok I won't do it. B
S.W.A.T. (2003) - Oh please. C-
PRINCESS MONONOKE (1997) - Great, but next to Spirited Away... B-
SOYLENT GREEN (1973) - So what if Soylent Green is people? 90% of them are stupid. D+
IRIS (2001) - Yum. Kate Winslet's naked a lot. That's really the only happy thing in it. De-pressing. B
SAY ANYTHING... (1989) - I guess I should have seen it when it first came out. B-
LAUREL CANYON (2003) - Produce a record, have sex, smoke pot. Sleep in. B-
SEABISCUIT (2003) - Known as Seacookie outside of England. Feel good pony movie. Sure is purdy. B
PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL (2003) - Xlnt. Depp summons up Keith Richards. Rated Arrrr... A
SINBAD: LEGEND OF THE SEVEN SEAS (2003) - Hey! The female villain lives in a giant glowing vagina! Cool. D
YOU LIGHT UP MY LIFE (1977) - What can I say? This is the crap HBO shows Sunday nights at midnight. F
NORTHFORK (2003) - A snail is faster than this movie. Not as interesting though. B-
FEAR OF A BLACK HAT (1994) - Don't shoot until you see the whites. "...of their eyes?" Whose eyes? C
TERMINATOR 3: RISE OF THE MACHINES (2003) - Wet T-Shirt 3: The Girl You Don't Take Home To Mother. B
CHARLIE'S ANGELS: FULL THROTTLE (2003) - Chuck's Chicks: My Screen Credit's Big. C
28 DAYS LATER (2003) - Bloody Hell! Now that's a zombie flick. A-
MAY (2003) - Gotta watch those quiet anti-social types... we're, um, uh, they're up to something. B-
HULK (2003) - Hulk not so good. Hulk look funny. Hulk don't talk. Hulk too long. Hulk want franchise. C-
ALEX & EMMA (2003) - A romantic comedy that is neither. Udder crap. Mooooooo... F
WHALE RIDER (2003) - There are other films shot in New Zealand, besides trilogies, that are just as good. A
SPELLBOUND (2003) - Nerdrific. "N - e - r - d - r - i - f - i - c" Nerdrific. A
BRUCE ALMIGHTY (2003) - Jim Carrey makes Jennifer Aniston's boobs big. That's not such a bad thing. B
FINDING NEMO (2003) - Fintastic. Well the first half was. B+
THE MATRIX RELOADED (2003) - Tonight we dance, for tomorrow we die! What's with the giant rave party? B-
BLUE CAR (2003) - Why poets grow up to drink and kill themselves. A downward spiral. B+
X2 (2003) - 2X as boring. Mutant's as gay metaphors subtle as a hammer. C+
WINGED MIGRATION (2003) - A flockumentary of birds doing bird stuff for 1.5 hours. B+
IDENTITY (2003) - Blood, cursing, and Amanda Peet. Meow. Chewed the top off my water bottle. B+
SHAOLIN SOCCER (2001) - Chinese feel good movie. Kung Fu and soccer, who'd of thought? B
A MIGHTY WIND (2003) - The comedy bar has been set for this summer. Folkin' funny. B+
GHOSTS OF THE ABYSS (2003) - What?! Kate Winslet's boobs aren't in it? Like all 3d movies, no plot. C+
ANGER MANAGEMENT (2003) - It's got Marissa Tomei. Yeah. Woody Harrelson as a transvestite, blech. C
FAR FROM HEAVEN (2002) - Ya gots the jungle fever and your husband's gay. What's a 50's housewife to do? A-
SECRETARY (2002) - "Sex, Lies and Videotape", "Crash", and now this. James Spader is a perv. B
SEX AND LUCIA (2001) - Now that's a sexy movie. Think I'll watch it again, and then one or two more... OK, three times. B
THE RAZOR'S EDGE (1984) - Bill Murray not being funny. Or interesting. Or particularly anything. C-
BRINGING DOWN THE HOUSE (2003) - Damn, suckered in by big box office grosses. Not one laugh. D
THE PIANIST (2002) - More explosions and gunfire than piano playing in the 2 1/2 hours. Great. A-
CITY OF GOD (2002) - Probably not on Brazil's Tourist Board must see list. Not for the weak. B r u t a l. A
RAIN (2001) - Kiwi's destroying their marriage in slo-mo. Looks like it was made in 1971. B
ONE HOUR PHOTO (2002) - Time to get a digital camera. Red Boxter is my friends car. Sleepy creepy. C
LOST IN LA MANCHA (2002) - Terry Gilliam is more crazy than genius. He licks his lips a lot. C
OLD SCHOOL (2003) - Will Farrell: Comic genius. Party on. B+
DAREDEVIL (2003) - For a superhero, he sure does get his ass kicked a lot. Awful. D
SPIRITED AWAY (2001) - Beautiful backgrounds, Speed Racer animation. Schweet. A-
SHANGHAI KNIGHTS (2003) - Suckiest suck movie of the sucking year. Suck. F
BLUE CRUSH (2002) - Cheeky girls doing stuff on waves. Low tide. C
TWO WEEKS NOTICE (2003) - Hugh Grant as Hugh Grant. About a Boy and a girl. Chica Pelicula. B
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